The Week that was Overdue

This week sucked. Sucked .... I tell you.

Monday and Tuesday weren't too bad. I was up about $400 each day, but it was all downhill from there.

On Wednesday, I was up about $400 at lunch and then I started trading OIH. I traded this stock early on with moderate success, but it is definitely not a stock to take lightly. It will have a 50 cent swing in the matter of a minute, so if you are on the wrong side of the trade with 400 shares, there is going to be some pain. Unfortunately, I let my emotions get the best of me a couple of times in that stock on Wednesday afternoon. By the time the day was over, I was only up $8. Sad.

On Thursday, I continued my bad luck. I did not have a winning trade in my "bread and butter" stock all day (SLV). My win percentage for all trades was 38%. Things sucked and I had my first losing day in almost 30 trading days. Down $160. I made some horrible decisions and just couldn't recover. I hate losing, and yesterday reminded me just how hard I am on myself when things go wrong.

Today ... I had my second losing day in a row. Although I was only down $15 on the day, I did not have a winning trade in SLV again. Needless to say my confidence is shaken, and here I am again, doubting myself.

I have said all along that I am worried that I am so dependent on one stock to make my money. The last two days proved my point. I missed all the big moves in SLV for one reason or another. Yesterday I was too busy babysitting a losing position in another volatile stock. Today, I stepped away for 3 minutes to grab some food for lunch. Of course, there were also times when I was on the wrong side of the move and lost money. This has definitely got me concerned. I need to figure something out.

I also think I am getting a little burned out on trading. I have been working extremely hard since the beginning of March trying to be a better trader. I come home after the day is over and study charts to no end. I read books and magazines and try to absorb as much as possible. I dream about it when I sleep at night. I have become completely obsessed with trading and being successful. There is no doubt, I have learned a lot and gotten better, but frankly, I think it is starting to take its toll on me. I need to take a break. I was going to take one today, but I felt guilty. After all, I am paying the exchange fees, lunch fees, user fees, etc. every day. I might as well try to go in and make money. I think I may need to force myself to take a day off here sometime soon to refresh myself.

One thing that I have definitely missed since starting to trade has been being able to buy myself things -- as a reward for all the hard work I have been doing. I probably made 2 to 3 purchases a year when I worked at my other job, and there was something about it that made me feel good. Unfortunately, I don't have the luxury to do that at all these days. Heck, I can't even really afford to go out to eat these days, and that is something Kim and I loved to do. Things like that are tough, and when I have a week like I had this week, I wonder whether I wouldn't be better off having a steady paycheck and being able to enjoy the things I want to enjoy in my time away from work. Uggghhh ... I don't know.

In other news, I got a part-time job offer presented to me at work this week doing ... of all things ... software testing. One of the software managers came up to me and said that they were looking for some extra QA people, had heard that I had QA experience, and wanted to offer me a part-time position. I would be ... get this ... writing and exectuting test cases along with managing a group of other non-technical traders who would be testing as well. The pay would probably be around $20/hour which is pretty decent. Anyway, I think I am going to do it because the cash will certainly help. Plus, I will still be working with the trading platform and that could help in the long run as well. I can work from home in the evenings and on the weekends as necessary, so it seems like a pretty good situation. So here I am ... back to software testing ... wow.

All in all, I know I need to count my blessings. I still like what I am doing and I don't have a boss telling me I HAVE to work this weekend, but I could use a vacation. I haven't really had one of those in a long time. I suppose Labor Day weekend will suffice for now. Sigh.