Crossroads / Week Summary

Another week has come and gone. Not much new, pretty much same old story with the job.

This was my worst week for the month of July. I think I ended up the week positive around $1000. That is still nothing to frown about, but it isn't going to pay the bills in the long run. It was a lot tougher to trade the same style I had for the past couple of weeks. I wasn't getting filled as much and definitely didn't trade as many shares. I guess that is what makes this job so challenging ... it is constantly changing. What works for you one day, won't work for you the next. It is up to you to be sharp, make the changes, and find success. I still love the challenge and can't see myself going back to corporate America anytime soon.

However ....

I found something out this week that was a little frustrating for me. It appears that my group was the first starting group at the company that is being compensated under a new plan. As a result, I am getting 10% less of the profits I generate than what I had expected (up to $1 million :-) ). When I found this out this past week, I started looking for documentation I received from the company when I was first interviewing with them because I know I was told a different compensation structure. In fact, I think I was even given a sheet of paper with the compensation structure. However, I can't find it. I don't know whether it is lost, or I threw it away, but I don't have it.

I know I signed some papers when I joined and the payout percentages were in there. Unfortunately, with my attention to detail, I didn't pay attention to the numbers, and I don't think anyone else in my group did either. Also, I don't remember HR making an effort to point it out to us either, so I kind of feel that they were trying to slip one past us. That is pretty uncharacteristic of me to not go over something like that with a fine tooth comb, but it is what it is, and I can't change that. Besides, what would I have done anyway if I had found it? If I called them on it and raised a stink, they could have let me go. Then what would I have done? I had already quit my tech job, and, then, I would REALLY be unemployed.

Couple this situation above with some pretty steep trading fees and expenses, and I have seriously begun to doubt if I am going to be able to make it. I know I have said in the past that if I could make half as much as I did with my tech job, then I would be happy. However, after doing some number crunching this weekend, I would have to average making $500/day with trading just for that to be the case. There are traders in the firm who average $2k or $3k a day, but they have been doing this for a long time. I think during the month of July I have averaged a little over $300/day, and I feel I had a very good month. Honestly, I am going to really have to step up if I am going to average $500/day. Stepping up means assuming a lot more risk, and I guess I just need to say "screw it", it isn't my money anyway, right? I know I have been successful trading a default of 300 shares, now it is almost back to square one next week as I increase my default share size and see if I can take the next step forward.

So here we go again, the fear of doing something new. The fear of change. I have to step out of my comfort zone to make something happen. Tune in next week for the update.